Articles, Blog

Can YOU Name Every Hulk?! | Earth’s Mightiest Show


LANGSTON BELTON: What
makes the Hulk the Hulk? We discuss. LORRAINE CINK: And we
tracked down every member of Bruce Banner’s family tree. Hi, I’m the Savage She-Lorraine. And I’m totally
awesome Langston. And this is Earth’s
Mightiest Show. And today, we are hulking out. Grrr! You know, a lot of you
probably already know the Incredible Hulk, a.k.a. Bruce Banner. But did you know he’s got
a whole family of Hulks? That’s right. Well, hey, let’s smash through
the Banner family album. Bruce Banner, a.k.a. the Incredible Hulk, is
definitely one in a million. But he is not alone
in his Hulkdom. In fact, the majority of
his family has gone gamma. Let’s take a look. We start with Bruce’s mother
Rebecca Banner and father, the abusive Brian
Banner, who would later be known as Devil Hulk. While he is not big
and green like his son, in death, Brian
Banner gains power based on Bruce’s fear
of him and possesses other gamma-irradiated beings. Now, that’s one controlling dad. But Bruce’s family
isn’t all bad. Enter Jennifer Walters, ace
attorney and favorite cousin of Bruce Banner. After a gunshot wound, Jen was
saved by a blood transfusion from her cousin Bruce, which
granted her her own Hulking power, complete with green
glamazonian size and strength, but the added ability to
retain her intelligence. But despite Bruce being
a literal rage monster, he still managed to find the big
love of his life, Betty Ross. However, Bruce was about to
have even more daddy issues with his future father-in-law
and full-time Hulk foe, General Thaddeus “Thunderbolt” Ross. Ross’s desire to
destroy the Hulk led him to enlist
evil help to transform himself into Red Hulk, a deadly
brute with a tactical mind. It seems red is in
this family’s blood, because Betsy Ross got
into the gamma game after her seeming death
from gamma poisoning and was resurrected
as the Red She-Hulk. After some time fighting the
Hulk alongside her father, she joined the
green side of good. She was still red, though. But Bruce and Betty would
have some bumps in the road, especially because Bruce got
married to an equally green alien queen named Jarella. And Betty took a break to
marry Hulk foe Glenn Talbot. The Hulk would also later marry
an epically strong alien named Caiera while on
Sakaar and father twin boys named
Skaar and Hiro-Kala. In addition to all
them nifty Hulk powers, they also inherited
their mother’s old power, allowing them control of
her tectonic energies. What a power couple! This leads us to
Hulk’s daughter Lyra. The Hulk and Thundra
from an alternate Earth shared but a kiss
and some romantic DNA splicing to create her. Like her dear old mom,
Lyra is an elite warrior sent to our world
to find and humble the greatest male warrior. Fun! And we have gotten a glimpse
of how Hulk’s lineage might continue on with
even more children in the future, enough
children, in fact, to form the
troublemaking Hulk gang. However, that has not
happened just yet at least. Not in our timeline. Like any family tree, Bruce
Banner’s is ever green. I think the big
takeaway from that is that if you hang
out with Bruce Banner, you will become a Hulk. That’s true. Yes, get your stretchy pants. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah! Great for Thanksgiving
and for Hulking. But you know, I’ve been
doing a ton of research on the Hulk in general. And there are about 50 Hulks
that aren’t even Bruce Banner, and nearly double
that many characters have gotten powers, for better
or worse, from gamma radiation. So then that got me thinking. What actually makes a Hulk? Oh, interesting. Well, all right. Well, if you’re going to–
if you’re making a Hulk– if you’re making a Hulk,
cooking up a Hulk at home, well, you’re going to have to
start with gamma radiation, right?
– True. Like our friend Dr. Bruce
Banner who first encountered generation with the gamma
bomb, which transformed him into the Hulk, as we all
know, or Amadeus Cho, who became the Totally
Awesome Hulk– great name– by using nanobots. And She-Hulk got a blood
transfusion from Bruce Banner. That’s just lousy
with gamma bits. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah! – Gamma blood.
– But she’s lucky. At least she got to kind of keep
her mental facilities better. Also, true.
Yeah. LORRAINE CINK: And she
gets to be a lawyer. LANGSTON BELTON: Yeah. LORRAINE CINK: Everybody wins. Also, I think a real calling
card of being an actual Hulk is that they have to transform. And that transformation needs
to give them big strength. And sometimes,
that’s even mental strength, because if you think
about the Leader, he’s a Hulk. LANGSTON BELTON: Yeah. LORRAINE CINK: But he
also got like a lot of mental enlargement. LANGSTON BELTON: Yeah. LORRAINE CINK: Like
literal, he’s– LANGSTON BELTON: Green. LORRAINE CINK: Literally,
he’s got a huge head. LANGSTON BELTON:
Green, big brain, jerk. They are visibly transformed,
yes, by the gamma radiation that they have seeped
into their bodies. But whether they can change back
or not, the Abomination cannot. LORRAINE CINK: That’s true. Yeah. Not all Hulks can necessarily
change back, because I wouldn’t consider Abomination a Hulk. Well, I mean, Abomination–
well, first of all, they don’t call themselves Hulks. They call themselves
Abominations. Yeah. All of them call
themselves Abominations. But eh, you’re not. You’re a miracle of
science that happens to look like an abomination. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah, the
Abominations look bad. They also choose to all
go by like Abomination. LORRAINE CINK: The others,
the Teen Abomination, Rick Jones became A-Bomb, and
Aberration, which is also– LANGSTON BELTON: It’s a
synonym for Abomination. But to be fair, I
like Aberration. I like Aberration,
because you’re like, this is a deviation
from the norm. Deviation from Abomination,
which is an Aberration. LORRAINE CINK: Oh boy. I also think, you know, a
calling card of being Hulk is that they mess
with gamma radiation. Right. I feel like there are
a lot of science dudes who are just like, oh, you know
what would fix my problems? Gamma radiation. Which radiation is not
usually the answer. Yeah, especially not gamma. Well, Doc Samson,
he just got buffed, got real jacked, and went
and got beautiful green here. LORRAINE CINK: That’s true.
LANGSTON BELTON: I mean– LORRAINE CINK: He
won the lottery. LANGSTON BELTON: 10
out of 10 green hair. You just want to lay in it.
It probably smells. I mean, don’t get too close. It’ll probably irradiate you. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah. But like everyone in
Bruce Banner’s life who works with him
in the lab is like, I’m going to test on myself. His old rival became Madman. Max Stryker just was like,
I’m going a test on myself and see what happens. I mean, these guys just can’t
be trusted with science. Now, do clones count? Does a clone count? Does a clone of a Hulk count? Like Behemoth is a Hulk clone. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah. Just he’s a straight up–
he’s the Hulk, basically. LANGSTON BELTON: Yeah, just
the Hulk– just another Hulk. Kluh is a clone
of the Gray Hulk. Kluh. LORRAINE CINK: What is Kluh? Well, I know what it’s– I know what Kluh is backwards. Do you know? I do now. You do now. I learned. Recently. Very recently. Tragically recently, in fact. That Kluh backwards is Hulk. What else? I don’t read backwards. Anyway, Amazon. How about Amazon? She’s a clone of She-Hulk. LANGSTON BELTON: I get it. Clones do– well, you know what? This clone gets the
award for best name. Captain Zolandia. LORRAINE CINK: Yeah! He’s a Captain America
clone, actually. But he just is gamma irradiated. So it looks like I
got Captain America. Uh? Gamma! But you know what? A lot of Hulks
choose to be Hulks. Not all, obviously. But some are just
innocent bystanders and still become
Hulks, like there was a gangster who was murdered
and buried in the desert. And he was resurrected
because of a gamma bomb and became Digger. LANGSTON BELTON: Yeah. LORRAINE CINK: He’s
basically a Hulk zombie. LANGSTON BELTON:
I’m a Hulk zombie. I’m a gangster also. LORRAINE CINK: Oh, boy. Let me rob a bank
with my gamma powers. Uh, no. Ephraim Soles, he just ate
gamma-irradiated sprouts, like a clown and turned–
LORRAINE CINK: He just wanted– LANGSTON BELTON: Come on. If you look at the ground– hey, kids, take it
from Uncle Langston. If you look at the grown and
there’s a glowing sprout, it might be gamma irradiated. And it might turn into a
gelatinous Hulk monster. LORRAINE CINK: I feel bad. That guy just wanted
to have a salad. Don’t do it, kids. Well, you heard it here first. All right. Well, if you guys love
the Hulk, don’t worry. We’ve got a double dose of
gamma radiation coming soon. So stay tuned here at Earth’s
Mightiest Show on Marvel.com. Yes, that’s right. Coming soon, we’ve got
a look at the Hulk, but this time, we’re going
to look at Bruce Banner’s different Hulk personas. Because there are a lot. That man has got
like a whole village of people living inside of him. Anyway, tell us which
Hulk is your favorite, and hashtag Earth’s
Mightiest Show. – We’ll see you next time.
– I’m Lorraine. And I’m Langston. And this is Marvel. Your universe. [GROWLING]

100
Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *